INTO THE
PAST WITH PAIN..139

 

                                          Dr K
Prabhakar Rao

 

       (It is the parliament
and Gandhi, Nehru and Patel are seen sitting in public gallery. They are keenly
watching at others.)

 

Gandhi. Jawaharlal. You are the expert in these tricks of
the house. You were PM for nearly 16 years.

 

Nehru. Yes Bapu. I was the PM of this great nation  for 
such a long period.

 

Patel. Heee…heeee. I am happy that I died in 1950
immediately after India
was declared a republic.

 

Gandhi. Why are you so happy Patel?  You were a true soldier of freedom fighting.

 

Patel. By this time Bapu, You must have learnt the lesson.

 

Gandhi. What is there to learn
for me? I am a simple soul.                                                         

 

Patel. You will soon know it.

 

(Below, proceedings are being conducted. There are many
Members of parliament in the  hall. There
is a great commotion all of a sudden. Every one is standing and many are
shouting. Some  are seen running around. Marshalls too are running
around. Two  guys are seen
gesticulating  at each other, biting
teeth with rolled up sleeves ferociously. In the gallery also every one is standing
and making efforts to have a glimpse of the show going on. All theonlookers in
gallery are clapping and laughing)

 

Gandhi. Patel. What is happening? Few minutes ago all was
quiet.

 

Patel.  We do not know
when things go bad here. Tensions are high. Tempers are also high. Personal
scores are also settled here.

 

Gandhi.  That  is OK. 
Find out what is the problem. Look down and try to know.

 

(Patel goes to the front and peeps down and returns.)

 

Patel.  Bapu. Two guys
are fighting. They a re holding collars of each other and are at blows. Their
shirts are torn too.

 

Gandhi.  Are the guys
who are fighting some security personnel?

 

Patel. No Bapu. They are the elected representatives of
people. They are   like boxers. One guy
lost two teeth.

 

Gandhi. How about the other one?

 

Patel. He broke his hand

 

( On the floor   still
there is no peace. All are shouting)

 

Gandhi. Patel. Shall we go down and try to help them?

 

Patel. No bapu. We have no access to them. Only security guys
can go there.

 

Gandhi. Then we must turn into security guys. Let us
go. 

 

(The trio immediately turn into dress of security and land
up in the hall. They go near the MsP  who
are still exchanging blows)

 

Gandhi ( Catching one MP at the waist) Bhai. Please control
yourself. Why are you fighting?

 

MP1. Leave me.  Us kaa
khoon peejawunga ( I shall drink his blood) Kya samajh ta hai. Badmaash kainka..
suwwar kaa bacha. ( What is he thinking? Rascal…)( son of a pig)

 

Gandhi. Please cool down sir. This is not proper for you. You
are an MP. All are looking at you.

 

MP1. h kya hua ( so what)? 
Kya my chudiyaa  pahen ke bhaittoo
( should I wear bangles and sit down?) 
Wo badmash  mujhe gaali detahai.(
That rascal is abusing me)

 

Security. Sir ,please have control on self. 

 

( Patel in the mean time holds  the other MP 
who   is struggling to free himself)

 

MP2. Leave me  (chod
do). My us ka haddi passli kardoonga. ( I shall break  his bones and shall pundthemtodust) Use tare
dikha doonga( I shall show him stars)

 

Patel. No sir. You 
should not use such language. You are all respected  MP.

 

MP2. Bhaad me jaiye sab( 
Let al these be washed away in flood) 
Us lafange ne  ganda gaali deta
hai aur sunte rahhoon ( that guy  has
abused me in foul language  and should I
listen? ).Kya samajha tha hai mujhe.( What hethinks ofme) Kya mai uska naukar
hoon ( Am I his servent?). Uska sar kuchal 
doonga. ( I shall smash his headunder my fot) Usse mer baaremein patha
naheen ( He does not know about me). My  Mera
area mein bada khoonkar goonda hoon.( I am a big    bully in my area).

 

Patel. All this is oK sir. Yet you must not fight. Whole
world is watching us. They shall laugh at us.

 

( In the mean time 
the MP1 loosens  himself   and falls on MP2. Both exchange blows
violently   and  roll on ground. Speaker, PM  and other senior MPs gather around them. MO1
bites off ear of MP 2. He screams loudly

 

MP2. Haye. Maardiya mujhe is harramine ( I am killed b
this  rascal)

 

PM. Ohfo. What type of guys are there in parliament?

 

Speaker .As we sow so we reap. You got the ready answer sir.

 

 PM. I do not know how
these guys   got party tickets? They
appear to be just street fighters.

 

Speaker. Sir you have seen only a small show today.

Luckily you are present here today. Now imagine my  fate in this hall every time I am here. I
keep my fingers crossed.

 

PM. Some thing is required to be done. Send these characters
out from the hall and ask them to resign. They are not fit for this post.

 

Speaker. I will try that. It may be difficult. Very soon
they  will tender apology.

 

PM . I am going. Do something. Whole world  is laughing at us.

 

(The two MPs are taken away 
by Marshalls
and they are suspended for the  entire
session  of the year, The marshals  see 
some new security guys in the hall ( these are Gandhi, Nehru and Patel.
They go to the trio)

 

Marshal. Who are you. Are you real security guys. You appear
to be new. I have not seen you earlier.

 

Patel. We are newly posted.

 

Marshal. By whom?

 

Patel. That is beyond your comprehension.

 

Marshal. What does this mean? Show your Identity cards.

 

Gandhi. we  do not
have. We do not need also.

 

Marshal. Why? How do we 
know  who you are?

 

Gandhi.  We are
they   and they are we.

 

Marshal. What does this mean?

 

Patel.  Things are
very clear.  We are they what you think.
They are also we, what should be. Do you want to see them or we, or we  or they. Tell us soon.

 

Marshal. . eee….eee….ee….. Iam   done. 
Some thing is happening in my brain.

 

Patel. Take it easy.

 

(Suddenly the trio turns into Gandhi, Patel and Nehru. The
Marshals are shocked. They pounce on the trio to catch them. They are unable to
catch them as they do not have physical bodies. They keep jumping around as if
they are catching some  flies in air.  Seeing this confusion some senior leaders and speaker
arrive along with PM   who  just returns)

 

PM.  Who are you guys?
Why you are dressed as our national leaders. 
Who gave permission to enter parliament hall?

 

Gandhi. Look PM sahib. We do not need any permission from
any quarters.

 

PM. Why? How can you 
enter without permission into parliament hall? Is it a street  assembly 
and show?

 

Gandhi. Then what? 
Have you seen what was going on here? How it can be different from a
street show?

 

Speaker. Such things are nothing to do with you.

 

Patel. Why? Are you not accountable to people?  Have not people elected you guys to
parliament in good faith? Are people not paying taxes?

 

Nehru. Look . speaker sahib. Today’s tamasha  is great national a shame.  It  is
greater shame than  defeat at the hands
of Chinese army in 1962 during my time and attack on Bombay 
26/11.

 

PM. Sh. Shut up. You are exceeding limits. First tell me who
you are? Why are you dressed in Nehru’s dress? Whom you are trying to fool?

 

Gandhi. Look Mr. PM. Kindly note that you represent people’s
aspirations. That is why you are here. If you can not control your MPs in the
parliament how they can  be controlled in
their places? In the history of Indian parliament, this is the first time that
MPs  physically came to blows on the
floor of the house. What type of 
dignified conduct is this? What answer you can give.

 

PM. I need not answer you. You are a fake  Gandhi. Even if real Gandhi comes here , he
can not do any thing. This is a changed world. Gandhis days were over long ago.
Even Nehrus days are over.

 

 

Patel.. You are puppets of some one.  You 
sing to tunes kept ready from time to time. You have  no power of our own.
Heee…heeee..haaa…haaa..hooo..hooo

 

Gandhi. How sad! Look Mr. PM. Know that I am real Gandhi. We
have come to watch you guys  on the
floor.  It is disgusting and causing
great shame that we got you guys freedom. Even sir Winston Churchill former PM
of UK warned that India
would be in the hands of shady characters and nuts. How true it is today!

 

( Suddenly Churchill with hat  appears   
and dances singing. Clouds of smoke  
emanates from his   pipe)

 

Churchill (sings)

 

I warned you guys long ago

That your country would become a joke

Nasty guys would rule your land

Better get out   and drink  adulterated Indian coke

 

Criminals are being 
given party tickets

They win by money 
and  land up here

They fight each other as if in a slum

Growling at each other 
as a wild bear

 

( Churchill vanishes when Marshals try to catch him)

 

Speaker. You guys are misbehaving here. Better I put you
behind bars for violating security at parliament.

 

Patel. Better do that fast before we vanish.

 

PM. How dare you challenge us! Now  count 
bars behind locked doors.

 

Gandhi. Heee..heee

 

Patel. Haaa… haaa. Come and catch us( He raises  hands and dances and sings)

 

Come and come   and
catch us

Catch us oh nuts if 
you  can

 You will lie flat on
the mat

And roll like a dirty 
broken pan

 

Speaker. Come on Marshals 
catch these guys. These are mere tricksters claiming to be real Gandhi,
Nehru and Patel. They breached our security.

 

Patel. Look Gentlemen . this is not first time that your
security was breached. Some time ago Pak terrorists breached your security  and 
came into Parliament complex in  a
car. You could not settle the case till today. 
How can you look after the country when you can not look after the
parliament security. You have seen what happened in Bomaby on 26 september.
Handful of pak terrorists  butchered guys
on streets and  created mayhem. They were
no doubt killed. But how it could take place? Then you wanted Pak  ISI chief to fly to India  and 
bow to you and say sorry. In which world you are living? How did you
expect that the guy would fly to you. You guys 
have made a joke of yourselves. 
Any how you are cooking your own goose. 
Better learn atlesat now before it is too late.

 

Speaker. Is it enough and over?  Now take from us. Marshals go.

 

( All the Marshals 
fall on the trio with great speed 
from behind. They stumble on them as they have no bodies  and fall flat on the ground amidst the furniture
breaking their teeth, noses     arms
and legs. They shout Mar Gaya, Bacho, 
Bacho. They take speaker  and PM
also  with them. Suddenly lights go off
and sky gets dark. No one knows where he is. Some cats also that were hiding
jump over them in confusion.  Every where
shouts and shrieks are there.)

 

Patel. Bapu. Come on let us go. Enough for today

 

Nehru. OK Bapu. Let us go. Army may be called in.

 

Gandhi.  Let us go.

 

( the trio vanishes singing Ramdhun )

 

                                         CURTAIN FALLS

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

---------------- Note: Content of this blog post is writer's personal opinion and may not be SanghParivar.org or Sangh's view.